Days III and IV: Phlegm vs. Phlegmatic?

It's too early to tell, but I feel less stuffy, less congested. Is it a fluke? A placebo effect? (though a rice cracker makes a lousy placebo for an English muffin). Is it the absence of dairy, sugar, caffeine, or beer or wine, all of which can cause inflammation, and which I often crave? All of the above?

Oh God, don't let it be all of the above...

Because if this congestion-free feeling sticks around, one or more of the above may have to be cut back, or cut out. Or...maybe it's bumping up the intake of anti-inflammatory foods, like fish (Omega 3s), walnuts (for protein). Or a combination of both.

I decide on Day 4 that after this cleansing diet is over, instead of gorging myself on all the forbidden foods starting December 1, it's time for a little test. Introduce an item or group slowly, singluarly, and see how I feel. Maybe stop and alternate. Then think about some longer-term changes.

Part of doing 'Ground Into Fall' for me was to root deeper into who I was and what makes me tick, from what I eat to working on trying to reach a state of grace (both physical and metaphysical) to being more mindful and setting--and achieving--intentions. Frankly, I'd like to tick a little better.

So the idea of experiencing an emerging physical change this quickly is both exciting and scary. I'm used to being stuffed up this time of year and staying that way for months: November's been notoriously a bad month. In an earlier phase of life November typically marked the onset 0f recreational smoking. Almost like a fit of youthful pique, I would think "well body/lungs/respiratory system, if you're going to stuff me up and make me cough and sniffle, then screw you, I'm show you what really hurts!"

Yeah, I really showed myself there.

Now I notice right away, especially when I wake up in the morning the past couple of days, that breathing is easier. It's like throwing open the windows in spring and knowing it's not too cold to leave them open the better part of the day. It feels really good to open my eyes and breathe clearly, and I notice that waking up is getting easier too. The Yerba Mate is even growing on me. Smoothies are looking less brown. Breakfast salad is starting to seem normal.

What's really funny and kind of ironic is that the relative absence of pleghm (such a funny word) by knocking off on certain foods makes breathing easier and me feel more phlegmatic, or calmer, temperment-wise. When I learned about the four humors (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Temperaments#Modern_adaptations) in English literature 'phlegmatic' to me was one of those words that always seemed to mean the opposite of how it sounded. Shouldn't someone who's phlegmatic be snotty instead of stolid? I remember being fascinated by Hippocrates' classification of the four temperaments and how they were attributable to four body fluids (humors): blood, yellow bile, black bile, and my old friend, phlegm.

Now I think I may finally get what the concept of phlegmatic means, and maybe literally getting the feeling. And it feels good. Unsurprising when you consider, in the inimitable words of 'Time for Timer," that we are what we eat, from our head down to our feet. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mE7szSLE924)

So pass me a couple more of those walnuts. But hold the sugar.

Day II of the Cleanse: All Saint's Day and Two Differing Views of the Beatific Vision of Heaven

At 6 am it's dark when I stumble down the stairs, zombie-like. Turning on the lights reveals two plastic pumpkins filled with the spoils of last night's Halloween romp through Mt. Tabor neighborhood. My children fared well from our neighbors' generosity on All Hallow's Eve. The urge to peek in and inventory their candy is irresistible, the temptation to steal a piece easier to tamp down, though I'm sure a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup would taste awfully good with coffee. Sinfully good.

But on Day 2 of the Cleansing Diet, and All Saints' Day, when the Western faithful celebrate those that have made it to heaven and see the light (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_Saints) there'll be no pilfering of Halloween candy, no coffee. That's the trick. The treat is a spike of agave syrup in a cup of Yerba Mate. For a moment I feel like Charlie Brown announcing, as he looks into his bag, 'I got a rock.' I am definitely not in Heaven.

I don't do restraint well, particularly when it comes to morning coffee. This is one of the parts of the diet I'm the most afraid of, not only for absence of the morning caffeine boost, but the loss of the ritual of making the coffee, of awakening through its smell. Hell, I can live without soy products for a month; that's easy. No coffee, and wait, no dairy. That makes for a complicated morning. With the work week beginning, no less.

So breakfast this morning is a smoothie, with rice milk, more agave, protein powder, a pear, blueberries, and greens. Two cups full. The end result resembles brown cement before it cures. But it's drinkable. Not bad, really. "Not bad, really" will later becomes the week's mantra for 'it tastes better than you'd think."

Our kids think we are crazy, embarking on this martyrdom. This diet is clearly ONE OF THOSE THINGS ADULTS DO that make no sense. Why would you not want to eat Halloween candy? Rice milk over cow's milk? No oranges? Don't you always tell us we need Vitamin C? I have no answer for that. I love citrus fruit, miss it already. The juicer sits in the corner, abandoned.

As I mix up a lunchtime salad with smoked salmon and balsamic vinegar dressing, I recall that today is All Saint's Day. In Lithuania, where I lived for two years, All Saints', known as Velines was a significant holiday (http://www.ehow.com/how_2064995_celebrate-all-saints-day-lithuania.html). Lithuanians--along with other Balts, Poles, and those in several other Eastern European countries--commemorate Velines/All Saints' by remembering their ancestors and preparing for a visit from their departed family members and relatives. It's customary for people to visit and tend the graves of loved ones at darkfall. Then they feast.

Nearly 20 years ago I was invited to a celebration of Velines. It was somber, full of reflection. I recall walking with friends to visit their family plot, and being given a candle to carry. I will never forget the sight of lines of candles -- pearls of light, really -- appearing by the hundreds and converging on the cemetery, their glows flickering in the dark as if the spirits were indeed rejoining the living that night. It was hauntingly beautiful. The feast we had afterwards was sumptuous, and there was rye bread to celebrate the harvest, and portions left at the table should the dead want to join the feast.

I head for work, thinking that for today, for the next 28 days, the oyster crackers in the pantry I love to snack on, the goat cheese in the fridge, the loaf of whole wheat bread, the honey, everything the kids don't end up eating, could be a meal for the spirits of the departed. I don't need them, and I'm happy to be alive.

Even if my smoothies turn out brown. Even I can't eat bacon right now.

Day I: What Was I Thinking?

It's the morning of October 31, Halloween, and I'm staggering around the house feeling gobsmacked. Sunday, my favorite day to make coffee and read the paper, and there is no coffee. Literally. We are out.

The rub is, we ran out intentionally. As part of our cleansing diet, coffee, and ultimately caffeine in any form, should be off the diet for the next 30 days. So is red meat, anything made with wheat. Dairy's gone. Citrus? Uh uh. Tomatoes and peppers? Gone, daddy gone.

Wow, I think. I'm PAYING for this experience?

The answer is yes, I am paying for this experience. Financially, emotionally, and physically. I am sore from last night's intense yoga class, my head is sore from the three glasses of red wine that was part of the Halloween costume party and 'goodbye for 30 days to certain food and drink staples' that followed, and now I have a coffee-withdrawal headache.

To borrow from Jimmy Buffett, my head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus.

At least for now. Honestly, I need to change my outlook, and will. In addition to the dietary changes, part of the 'Ground Into Fall' workshop involves exploring principles of the Anusara yoga practice I started in April. This week's principle is attitude.

And mine's grumpy right now. That needs to change. So does the attitude that I can unthinkingly shovel whatever I want into my body these days and achieve different results, healthwise. That's a little too close to Einstein's definition of insanity

The thing I'm trying to remember about this effort is that I CHOSE this, set an intention to do this. No one put a gun to my head and said 'quit eating cheese, lemons, or drinking coffee for a month.' This was part of taking on the attitude that, after 30+ years of making food choices, good or bad, it was time evaluate some things about what I ate, when I ate them, how often, and why. It's tough--but realistic--to admit, that my body's changing as I age (gracefully), and those changes are going to require some adjustments.

Of course, making dietary adjustments here is really also a symbol for making attitudinal lifestyle adjustments to my physical and metaphysical states of being. It's all interconnected, after all. The intent is to walk further down the path of becoming a better, more complete person.

Only this month, I'll be doing it with a cup of yerba mate in the morning. Sorry Juan Valdez, look me up in early December. Maybe.

Meantime, what's for breakfast?

Prelude: Let the Cleansing Begin

This month I've elected to go on a cleansing diet as part of a workshop Stacy and I are taking called 'Ground Into Fall.' The workshop combines making dietary changes for four weeks (more on that later) with learning more about Anusara Yoga principles (more on that later, too), along with four yoga sessions. I took the course primarily as a means of evaluating my eating habits, checking my dependency on certain foods and beverages (could I really live without coffee? beer or wine every 2-3 nights? cheese?). Like most folks, I feel more tired, lethargic, and susceptible to illness when the cold and dark rolls in.

Our course leaders, owners of the local yoga studio I frequent and one of their fellow instructors, who is a naturopath, raised a really interesting point. It's also ironic, our instructors say, that at the time of year we should be preparing ourselves and our immune systems for a metabolic slowdown and winter weather, we have two holidays that compel us to load up on sugary sweets (Halloween) and gorge ourselves (Thanksgiving). It's also easier to increase the uptake of stimulants (caffine, aka coffee for me) or depressants (alcohol), and comfort foods that are carb-rich or may actually increase inflammation and stuffiness (wheat, dairy).

I thought about that and the fact that a lot of us take the time to put away our summer and bring out our winter wardrobes and winterize our houses (I recently cleaned gutters, brought in firewood, and installed storm doors, for instance), but don't think much about 'body weatherization.'

The next 30 days will help address a series of questions, and of course, challenges: can the guy who claims he can eat virtually anything (except mayonaise-ugh) hold off on the foods and drinks he loves? How will I feel if I cut certain foods and substances out of my diet? Better? Worse? What will I eat? What did I learn from this, if anything.

This is also another chapter in the "Hell, I just turned 40, it's time to shake some things up around here" novella. I've never been on a cleansing diet for more than 24 hours.

So here goes...wish me luck.